One of the things that first drew me to the organization I work for is their commitment to take a person-centered approach to everything they do. It is an important part of the ethos of our work culture and has provided a foundation from which to lead.

Several weeks ago, my brother and I traveled to the Carolina coastline to scatter our dad’s ashes. Our father passed away a few years ago during that terrible COVID time when you had to say goodbye to your loved one over the phone while a nurse held the phone to their ear. As the end of his life was drawing closer, Dad told my brother and me that he wanted us to scatter his ashes at Duck’s Dance Club in Myrtle Beach once he passed. Duck’s is a hot spot for beach dancing among certain folks that can best be described as “rode hard and put up wet.”

This post is a little bit different from what I usually like to put out there, but as we are entering Mother’s Day weekend, consider this a giant high-five to the “childless” among us. To the mother figures, teachers, aunts, grandmas, mentors, stepmoms, or any woman who plays a special role in encouraging, inspiring, and loving children you didn’t give birth to, know that you are seen, valued, and an integral thread in the fabric of your community.  

Jacob married for the first time at twenty-two, whereas I was thirty-nine when he and I married. Understandably, we came into our marriage with wildly different adult dating experiences. Despite having gone through a divorce, he was far less jaded.

I should come with a warning label, something along the lines of: “Appears nice, can actually be quite prickly”.

I drove up the 101 the other night and was listening to NPR. The Pacific reflected the Santa Monica lights as I headed north. They were replaying a segment on the decline of friendships, which had originally aired a few months back. It highlighted that 2009 saw a noticeable downward shift in friendships and attributed our dependence on smartphones to much of the reason. Before that, a decline occurred in the 1950s when TVs became a common household asset for American families. Apparently, screens pulling people apart isn’t a new thing.

“You live here now.” Erin said with a whisper and a little nudge as we took in the city glow. We were atop Griffith Observatory and it was my first official day living in Los Angeles

You know the scene in You’ve Got Mail, where Joe Fox (played by Tom Hanks) is spending the day with his father's son, and his grandfather's daughter? He explains to Kathleen Kelly (the character played by Meg Ryan) how they are all connected to each other, and he wraps it all up by stating "We are… an American family."

I just love it so much.

We called my grandmother Mamaw when I was growing up. (Pronounced: Maww-maww). It was the 80’s in the rural south, so that didn’t sound odd to me at the time.

I threw up the first time I met Jacob’s ex-wife

Authenticity, adventure, and hospitality

I finally feel really at home in California, there is a lot of good and I am grateful for that. I feel myself surface and while the sun is in my eyes and the air is burning my lungs, this is right.

“I’m sorry to be calling with bad news, but I need to let you know that your father passed away about twenty minutes ago”. I called my brother Christian, and his wife, Erica to tell them the news. Not even 3:30am, going back to sleep was out of the question.

Upon arriving in Jordan, I heard “ahlan wa sahlan” (which means “welcome”) on a regular basis. Though hospitality and generosity are associated with many people and places, these characteristics are ingrained in Jordanian culture.

My phone rang early this past Friday morning and it was one of my dearest friends. She was navigating an awkward situation and she wanted to talk it out with someone. I poured a second cup of coffee.

“The first half hour of my run is for my body. The last half hour, for my soul. In the beginning the road is a miracle of solitude and escape. In the end it is a miracle of discovery and joy. Throughout, it brings an understanding of what Blake meant when he said, “Energy is eternal delight.”” ― George Sheehan, Running and Being

“You write as if your reader already knows you” -Jenn Wallin

“But, I think they do. Why else would they be reading?” -Me

My first words were “good girl” if that gives any indication of how incessantly praised my brother and I were as children. She even wrote us songs. Mine was called “Courtney’s World”, so basically, I was destined to be an attention-seeking monster from the very beginning.

I recently moved.

Some of the moments have bought me so much joy and lightness.  Board games, comfort baking (I’m really into crust right now), and super long walks around my neighborhood. It’s not lost on me that these things were all previously available – but there is a sweetness and a lack of hurry in it now - it’s laying the groundwork for something. I so am curious what can be built on this stripped down/decluttered lifestyle and long to hold on to the “enoughness” that it’s teaching me.