“You write as if your reader already knows you”. “But, I think they do. Why else would they be reading?”

As Jenn Wallin is my best friend and she knows all the things and I trust her with my life, I figured she might be on to something.

Up until now, my assumption has been that the only people reading my blog already know me and how I mostly spend my days, what I value and why. In this space I write if I am already known. This is a gift and the only way it works for me. Having heard authors teach that you should write as if you are writing a love letter to someone whom you love deeply, who is safe, and see the best in you, I have heeded this advice. The great Anne Lamont says: “You should write as if your parents are dead.” It’s a little harsh, but that posture helps too. I don’t want to change this approach to how I write as it’s the only way it works for me, because it is the only way it feels safe. So, let’s keep this up, okay? Even if we don’t technically know each other, let’s pretend we do and that we’re lifelong friends. This space is deeply vulnerable for me and if you want to be here, thank you so much, and know that you are welcome exactly as you are.

Since we’re friends and I don’t want to miss an opportunity to connect plus I don’t want to be rude, here’s the rundown; my name is Courtney. After years of feeling pulled west, I finally moved to Los Angeles in early 2018 and I love it here. Born and raised in North Carolina, I consider myself a southern lady through and through. While a completely unfair stereotype, I was taught that southern ladies demonstrate the highest standard of grace and hospitality. I fail at meeting these standards all the time, but I’m trying. Thank you notes and a properly set table matter to me.

I adore seeing new places and my skin starts to crawl without a goal. Adventure and (perceived) achievement are welcome distractions from the low-grade anxiety that floods my brain when left to my own devices. I spent some time living in New York City, long enough to thicken my skin, but I was forced to leave when the loneliness grew too much to bear. I invested many years and dollars earning a MA in from Gordon Conwell Theological Seminary. In early adulthood, I assumed I’d enter the family business of vocational ministry. God and I are still cool and committed, but now I believe I can better serve people outside the church than in it. Nowadays, my nine-to-five work is in nonprofit development and events management and I’ve been at it for a while at this point. I have the privilege of working with some of the kindest people, supporting some worthwhile causes and this makes me very proud. Like most of us though, I spend a lot of time sending emails and creating spreadsheets.

My relationship with food, exercise, and my body can get weird and I can always tell what’s going on inside by what’s going on outside, if that makes sense? It’s been this way for as long as I can remember. Thanks to therapy and self-care, most days it’s okay. There’s been much growth, but I do need to keep an eye on it for the health of myself and my relationships.

I am crazy in love with my boyfriend Jacob. We met three weeks after I moved to LA and someday, I’ll write out our story. It’s beautiful. Jacob and his three children (whom I love as my own) are the greatest surprise of my life. I cherish our life together. We are figuring out what an atypical family looks like daily and I am often overcome with my gratitude for them. Meeting them at age 36, they required me to embrace growing up. It was time.

That’s my life and my heart. There’s more to it of course, I’m a daughter and a sister and a friend, but with that, I think I’ll pause for today. Here’s the high spots on all things Courtney. I’m so glad we’re friends and I love learning from each other. Even if I’ve heard it before, I’d love for you to share some of your story in the comments below.

OXOX